Name: Jack Spicer
Date of Birth: Irrelevant
Occupation: Evil Boy Genius
Place of Residence: Secret Evil Lair (Not my parents’ basement.)
It all started way back in the September of last year. Actually, now that I think about it, I don’t know the actual month, but I’m pretty sure it was Fall. Or at least not Winter. I was just going about my daily business, you know, staring at a map as I planned how to take over the world, which is still a thing that’s totally going to happen, by the way, when one of my Jackbots gave me some stupid puzzle box that Dad sent from Hong Kong.
It was pretty lame, though. Looking back on it, that was probably the easiest puzzle I’ve ever solved. Not that that’s saying much, seeing as I am an Evil Boy Genius, but you get the idea. Anyway, there was this ghostly hag inside, and she was real great at first, helping me with world conquest and stuff, but she was also a total jerk. Not in the evil way, either, just in the jerky way. She also smelled pretty bad.
I went around helping her get these Shen Gong Wu things which, in retrospect, are pretty dang cool. (Bonus Info: The Money Staff is the best one.)
Some stuff happened, Wuya double crossed me a few times, Ashley got herself involved, there were these Xiaolin dragon guys, and the rest is history.
Most of that Shen Gong Wu hunting stuff is over, and now I’m back on the road to world conquest. And what a sweet road it is.